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Rakashak
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Post subject: Tree-Hugger Diaries Posted: Tue Jan 01, 2008 5:59 am |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Tree-Hugger Diaries
Okay, that sounds a bit weird. Like one of those boring muggle cooking programs where they live outside, cooking from mushrooms and stuff.
Anyway, today’s New Years Day and my resolution is to keep a diary. And believe me, some of the stuff I hear or see just has to be written down. But the problem is, what if someone finds it? Well, I’ve decided to- hey, wait a minute. Why am I even talking/writing like this to a flippin’ diary! Honestly. Nevermind. This thing is just asking to be read. Nevermind.
Anyway back to normal writing.
New Years Day
Andrew Amaner. Most people despise him. In fact, you can’t turn a corner without bumping into someone who hates him. But you see, I’m drawn to him. I don’t know why. I guess dangerous people like him are drawn towards me, well, I’m drawn towards them. I don’t know what to say really. He took me to Egypt to see the sun go down. And I enjoyed it. Although, I heard about something scary that went on. It involved Andrew, Chase Armitage and Azar (The girl who’s dating that Spanish/Mexican guy and is close friends with Samantha Hathaway). Something involving a potion? Andrew and Chase both claim that it was the others fault. I don’t know who to believe, but more people are on Chase’s side. Chase is pretty messed up (More on that later) but, I don’t want Andrew getting hurt like he did last night. In Egypt. Some weird guy came up to him and beat him up, luckily Andrew beat him and he ran off. I think that it sometimes gets out of hand with Andrew around. Although, I don’t want to leave him. He seemed so relaxed with me around, and I felt better with him around. I don’t want another person close to me getting hurt… not like Will. Anything but that, I swear, if something like that happens again I’ll… I don’t know, but when Andrew left me I felt so, alone again. I feel like I’m obsessing. Andrew, the Greek guy with the colour changing eyebrow ring, and me, a boring Irelander who hugs trees and sits under waterfalls for fun. I bet thousands of girls would die to have him. But, myself? I don’t deserve him as a friend. Really. I’m not even like him, in every aspect. And I mean, every aspect. I just hope people don’t think that I am. Really. I don’t even know what to think anymore. And also Chase is beginning to scare me. He’s really depressed, and I mean really depressed. He’s drinking vodka all the time… and I know I’m not in any position to worry but- Nevermind. I’d better stop writing now. I’m missing more relaxing under waterfalls. And, I mean, by myself. Not with Andrew or anyone. Just me in classroom eleven. All alone. I think I need to be alone after what’s happened, and maybe when I said to Sam that I’m not messed up. I thought I meant it. But now… I don’t know so much anymore. I’m so confused. I need to be alone, although talking with someone helps a lot. But, I don’t know who.
Nathaniel Rhomas
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Tue Jan 01, 2008 1:10 pm |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Tree-Hugger Diaries
Yeah, I can’t believe I’m writing to this stupid book again. See? I’ve done it again. Talking to it, like it’s a living person! For goodness sake Nath! Get a grip! Anyway, back to my life:
New Years Day (again)
It’s really annoying and embarrassing. Everyone’s staring at me because of Andrew. Making intricate jokes about it as well. They may find it funny but I don’t. I guess they’re getting their own backs because I’m such a jerk. Roi even said: “Be careful hanging out with him!” Who does he think I am? I know what I’m doing. I was talking with Chase earlier, he was in Classroom Eleven. I know! What the heck is he doing in there? And I saw him by the lake in Hogsmeade. That’s where I once ruined his date with Rhea. I bet he was happy laughing at me. Anyway, we were talking, and… somehow he reminded me of Will. I don’t know how he does, he just did. And when he asked why I wanted to know that he was okay, I friggin’ cried! I’m such a wimp. Although, he was okay about it and everything. He helped me as well. I trust him now.
I was thinking about Andrew earlier. Should I really trust him? He’s been described as a backstabber, and I don’t know what to do. I remembered a song I heard a while ago. It was by Maddina or someone. It went something like:
“I looked into your face, my heart was dancing all over the place, I’d like to change my point of view, but I can’t stop thinking about you, You’re everywhere I go, and everybody knows, I pay for you with tears, I swallow all my pride. Nuhnuhnuhnuhnuh”
Yeah. It feels relevant somehow. And all these things are running through my head, like ‘Does Andrew like me? Too much even? Am I even…?’ Yeah. It’s scaring me. I want to escape. And no-one else helps anyhow. I’m going to go back to Classroom Eleven again. Being by myself really helps. And Classroom Eleven is like another home to me. Yeah. Tree-Hugger. That’s me.
Nathaniel Rhomas
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Wed Jan 02, 2008 3:48 am |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Tree-Hugger Diaries
Who am I? Really. What am I? Those are things I want too know. As I look at all these thoughts flaring through my head, I begin to wonder.
2nd of January
Okay, I’ve released myself from everyone else. I’m free. Well, I’m happy here in Classroom Eleven. I’ll call it CE from now on. It’s like a haven for me. I went to breakfast, okay, and there was a Greek style yoghurt there. And I’m sure that house elves don’t make Greek Yoghurt. Especially the fact that it was in a plastic container and a spoon was placed right on top. I mean, what the heck? It was right where I usually sit as well. Did he put it there? Did he? I didn’t see him anyhow. Everyone thought I was crazy. I peeled back the top and slowly put spoonfuls of it into my mouth. It smelt like him. With every spoonful, I kept it in my mouth as long as I could, enjoying the flavour. It was nice. But It sadly reminded me of him. Oh great, look at me! I’m obsessing. I’m such a Drama Queen. Well, King. I think I can start talking to people again now. Of course I can! They’re my friends after all. Right? I’m here, huddled up in my dorm, hugging myself. I’m not cold. Just stupid and paranoid. I’m making myself like this! I may as well lock myself in here. Or in CE. I don’t know what to do. I won’t give in to these stupid hormones and emotions. Hormones? What the HELL am I writing? Someone come and hang me! It won’t make any difference. Oh my god, what am I saying. I’ll just lie down in the CE, buy that stone circle thing so I can regain consciousness… or something. I need to regain sanity! I’m throwing myself into a whirlpool of despair. Just because of that backstabbing- oh great. I don’t even think he’s a backstabber. I’ll stop now. I need to stop. Full stop. This diary is tearing me into pieces, but repairing me at the same time. I’m being reborn… what the heck. I’m crazy. Chase was right. I’m a hyperactive maniac. Listen to me dragging on! I’ll go now. I’m such an idiot. Two faced hippy.
Nathaniel Rhomas
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 3:08 am |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Tree-Hugger Diaries
I’m here once again in my dorm, and I’m bored, sad and confused as usual. I’m messing myself up, I’m gonna end up like Chase, the poor guy. He looks a total mess too, well, he looks good, what I mean is I can see how emotionless and Expressionless he is. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him smile. That’s what I strive to do. I know, I’m such a meddling weirdo. At least I’m unique! So yeah, I’ve cleared up since my last entry. Feeling way better. I guess not being with Andrew has helped. I think. Okay it hasn’t. Being near him is like a weight being lifted off my shoulders. I can forget everything. But I didn’t see him. So, I’m not really okay. And that stupid idiotic Amber Raind didn’t help at all. Anyway, I’ll try to explain everything.
3rd Of January
Chase was in CE again today. What the hell is he doing in there? That’s my haven! Okay, It’s not really mine. But, I don’t know what he’s doing in there. So anyway, we were talking and he said, “Yeah, just try and stay alert, or you’ll do something wrong.” So I said, “I am. I know I am.” And he replied, “Good.” But I meant that I know I’m doing something wrong. I’m definitely not alert! At all! Later, I saw him in the EH (Entrance Hall) leaning against the placard as usual, and expressionless. I asked if he was waiting for someone, waiting for Rhea, and he nodded. I said, “I gave up waiting.” And I have, kind of. I don’t think he understood me though, as he took out another drink of his deadly V-Fluid. I think it’s Vodka and Pumpkin Juice? So yeah. Talking with him is like gaining knowledge or something, like an ascended master. He’s cool though. And he makes me feel comfortable when he says his usual, “Hey kid.” I hate being called kid, but Will said it all the time when I was a kid, so I’m cool with it. I’m currently trying to slice through Chase’s dark and mysterious behaviour, so far I have discovered:
A nod = Yes.
Ignores something I’ve said = No, he didn’t hear me or he’s got other more important things on his mind. Although I am more important than absolutely ANYTHING he has on his mind. Okay, that was a bit selfish. See! I’m getting better.
Okay, so I haven’t got very far on his mood and movement research, but I’m getting there. I went for a drink with him at the Hog’s Head. We had a pint each, and it was okay, but it’s so short. I can’t help but think he’s trying to get away from me. To be honest, I can’t blame him, I am terrible.
I had a fun time with Sam and Roi as well. Although I hate that Gregory Smith. He’s such a liar, and he pretends to be Irish. He’s all, I couldn’t lie. I’m an honest guy. Honest guy my backside! Anyway, forgetting him… Sam and Roi were funny. I told Sam about Andrew, and she was really supportive. I guess she’s got a lot of experience in that kind of thing. And I found out Roi likes Sam! I bet Connor doesn’t know! He’d blow his top if he did, I think… Sam was really funny when we were discussing her new ‘pet’ and our patronous’s. I wonder if Sam will ever break up with Connor? I don’t really see them as Boyfriend and Girlfriend. I wouldn’t be surprised if they did break up. However, I doubt she’d get together with Roi for a long time either. Not because of the height difference, I mean, look at Chase and Rhea, they practically survive and depend on each other. And not the fact that Sam makes very crude jokes about Roi’s height, I just don’t see them in an everlasting love. And no, I’m not going to go on about how much Sam and I would be perfect for each other simply because we’re not. I don’t even think I’ll ever fall in love. There is absolutely no one who can tame the random Nathan. It doesn’t really bother me… okay it does a bit. Everyone says, “You’ll find someone eventually!” But I wont. I know I wont. Someone might be in love with me, but I’ll never be in love with them. I know it sounds mean, but I just can’t. I may as well give in to Andrew. At least I’ll actually look happier. Nevermind. Enough talking about Love, it’s a dream I’ll never catch. Azar Kiko Lannarrino. Interesting name, and a different personality. Really, she wont eat anything but grapes at breakfast, and it’s funny because Pedro always tries to make her eat something. I managed to make her eat a chocolate bar, but I think Pedro got mad at me and he was all like, “Don’t you try and force-feed my girl, that’s my job.” I didn’t really care though, she’s a nice girl. Zane Von Mecklenbleh. I think it’s Mecklenberg, but Mecklenbleh sounds better. He’s Slytherin prefect, and he always comes into the EH in the morning with a copy of the Daily Prophet and a cup of coffee. When I see him, I always think of a deep dark blue, and stags. Don’t know why, maybe that’s what he smells like. Also, his wife? Betrothed? Girlfriend? Joki Wilde. She doesn’t talk much, I doubt I even heard her speak. She has a certain air about her, and I think she could be nice. However, I must be detractor man, as no one comes near me. I don’t blame any of them, I am an idiot. I heard something about Chase kidnapping Rhea? I think that’s a load of garbage, but you never know, although that idiotic Amber Raind said it, so it probably is a loud of garbage.
Anyway, I’d better stop writing as I’ve wrote sooo much tonight! … Oh great, I’m writing in a diary like it’s a human or a plant. Weird. Wait- I’m not saying that I talk to plants! Okay, you got me, I do. And I’m getting tired now, so goodnight! And things are getting better for me now, and I’m not in a emotional Turmoil again! So yeah. The tree-hugger is about to sleep. And the tree-hugger hopes everyone else does, so they don’t wake the tree-hugger up from his vital rejuvenating health and fitness sleep.
Nathaniel Rhomas
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Insanity
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Post subject: Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 9:22 am |
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Joined: Sun Sep 23, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 1336 Location: Hibernia
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(( I understand Nathaniel may have gotten it wrong but
Quote: And not the fact that Sam makes very crude jokes about Roi’s height
Sam never did that. She has a few times joked about him being small, but it was never in a 'crude' or serious way. It was that, jokes. ))
(( Edit: This post may be deleted, I simply wanted to mention the fact. Otherwise well-written, except it'd be alot easier to read if you used parahraphs Just saying. ))
_________________ Local Lurker and Knower of the Unknown and Unknowable. Also a bit full of itself, and an occasional prick.
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 1:34 pm |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Insanity wrote: (( I understand Nathaniel may have gotten it wrong but Sam never did that. She has a few times joked about him being small, but it was never in a 'crude' or serious way. It was that, jokes. ))
(( Nathaniel gets alot of things wrong, honestly, he really does, and since my posts are sooo long, I'll try and put them into paragraphs, any other feed back is appreicated, thanks.))
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 1:41 pm |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Tree-Hugger Diaries
3rd Of January (again)
Wow, Yule Ball soon. I can’t wait… can I? No one’s asked to go with me. I think I know who will though. But do I really want to go with Andrew? No, not really. I guess I’ll have to though because no one is going to ask me. I know no one is. Like I wrote in my last diary entry, no one is going to be right for me. I’m just going to be alone for the rest of my life. I don’t really care after all, true love is an impossible task, only people who are lucky actually find love, Chase and Rhea, perhaps. Nevermind, even if I have got a suit for the Yule Ball, I’m not going without someone.
One problem, all the girls have got boyfriends. Andrew it is though. But how do I explain to him that it’s not like that? I have no Idea. Nevermind, I’ll wait til the time is right. I’ll ask Sam. She can help. Although, from what I’ve heard, Sam’s a backstabber. I don’t really care though, I’ll make my own judgements from now on. She seems nice enough, and if all my friends are backstabbers, let them be. I guess I belong in that crowd, backstabbing hippy? Nah, doesn’t really fit.
Nathaniel Rhomas
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 5:01 am |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Tree-Hugger Diaries
4th Of January
I hope Chase is okay. I heard he was in the hospital wing. I don’t want him to be there. Will died, I don’t want Chase too either. I don’t want another person to be taken away from me. I really don’t. I’ve stayed in my dormitory all day, I hope the teachers don’t find out. I have a really bad stomach cramp, and I can just about make it to the bathrooms and back. I think it’s psychological, all this Chase business has probably done it too me, when I tried sleeping, I had nightmares about Will, this time, Chase was in his place. Not nice.
I have a high temperature, and a couple of fellow Ravens have asked to take me to the hospital wing, I don’t really want to hear other people screaming out in agony, and I don’t want to see Chase in his bed either, I asked a kid to take some chocolates to Chase, but considering he came back and said he passed them onto a kid called Archy Waslen, I highly doubt Chase will receive them. I tried to get to the hospital wing myself, but I couldn’t go any further than the swimming pool, and had to crawl back into my dorm. I can’t eat anything (apart from my apple pie I made the other day) without throwing up. It’s terrible. I hope Chase is better than me.
Someone said he was poisoned, others said it got stabbed. I don’t know which, but I just hope he’s okay. Since I’m going to be stuck here all day, I may as well do something, like, write a poem? I suppose, maybe based off a song Chase sings? Actually, you can never hear what he’s singing because he always sort of sings it without words… or something. But he can sing well. Okay here’s my bad attempt at a poem… I’ll try and base it around… vampires? Uh, yeah great genre pick.
This darkness that I never knew is taking over me,
Those blood and kisses never misses what I claim is mine,
My heart is broken my death has come near that I must now go,
It's that bad,
Don't leave it there!
What's happening here is serious,
My blood spilled on the floor.
On the floor is mess,
All blood and bones,
All that life is gone,
That I have won.
Yeah okay, it wasn’t that good. I’ll try again. This time I’ll base it around… werewolves? Yeah another great pick, I can’t think of anything else.
We’ve been searching all along, but there’s no trace to be found,
It’s like they’ve all vanished, but I know they’re around,
I feel them coming closer, the howls are sending chills down my spine,
My time is running out now, they’re coming down the hills from behind,
When we start killing, it’s all coming down right now,
From the light that we created, I want to be awakened right now,
From the heaven we’ve been in, I can never feel it calling to me,
The sun is rising, the screams have gone,
Too many have fallen, few still stand tall,
Is this the answer, to what we’ve become,
Will we remember, what we’ve done wrong?
Okay, one last go, this time I’ll base it around… Chase. Oh great, that’s all I can think about now, Chase, chase, chase. I just don’t want to lose him! I don’t want to! I’ll try and dedicate this poem to him…
Every time I see your face it makes me smile,
Every time I’m upset once in a while,
But out of all those times you’re there,
Sitting in the Hog on a chair,
And I’ll be happy,
Happy once again.
Okay I seriously SUCK at poems. I mean that last one seemed really sucky. Is that even a word? Nevermind.
Ow. If I wasn’t a guy, I’d think I was pregnant. Maybe I am? Oh get a grip! Being stuck in here isn’t helping me at all. Anyway, to take my mind off it, I’ll think of something else, that’s not Andrew. Really, he’s all my head is thinking of. Apart from Chase, I’ll try and think of Chase.
Oh yeah, I was thinking earlier, he couldn’t have always been like this, all dark and mysterious. I’m sure something must have slowed him down somehow. Maybe he’s been alone for so long? I mean, everyone else calls him lonely, and he never talks, maybe he doesn’t know how to communicate, and understand people properly? Maybe. I’m no psychotherapist, but I want to help him, and repay him for how much he’s helped me.
However, if he doesn’t get out of the hospital wing soon, I doubt he’ll be even alive. If you do die Chase, may your spirit soar above the clouds, and may you find peace wherever that may be. Wait a second, I’m over reacting, he may not even be ill, I should know that, I’m an expert in rumours and gossip. Although, I can feel he’s not well, I know it sounds stupid, but before we found out what had happened to Will, I had the same feeling. But Chase can’t die!
Anyway, going back to my Chase theory earlier, I wasn’t always such a hyperactive big soulless jerk. When the incident happened with Will, after a month of grieving, my parents flooded my world with anything to keep me happy, they didn’t want me to be sad again. In my house, before you go up the stairs to my bedroom, Will’s bedroom is there on the right. His bedroom is still the way it is, and his coffin is on the bed with him in it. We never go in there, the door is locked.
I don’t know why his body is still in there, it’s not like an angel is going to return his soul to his empty body. But I guess, that’s exactly what my parents want to happen. They always used to say, “Pray for him Nathaniel, ask the celestial’s to return him.” Although, when they say pray, they don’t mean like Christians do, we’re New-Agers, so it’s sort of doing the relaxing under waterfalls thing. I don’t want to see Chase dead on a bed like Will. I don’t want anyone to become what Will is, especially Chase, or… Andrew.
Nathaniel Rhomas
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 10:25 am |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Tree-Hugger Diaries
4th Of January (again)
I was just thinking, Is every in Hogwarts even SANE? Well, emotionally stable. Just think about it, Sam said she was messed up herself, I know Chase is messed up, um, is Roi messed up? I’m not sure, he’s seems pretty normalish… I think. The fact that he’s willing to become a prefect, and talks sensibly, makes him pretty normal. Okay, he’s in the normality bin. Who’s next on my imaginary check list?
Cald. Cald’s weird. And pretty violent, so is his whole family, apart from Zane, he’s seems eager with his class work. Normality bin!
Uh, Connor next. He’s pretty full of himself, and he’s going out with Sam (That doesn’t mean anything really, because Sam’s been out with lots and lots of people.). So I guess he’s messed up, who’s next? … Andrew.
To be honest, I have no idea. Okay concerning a few things, he’s messed up in a different way, but I mean, psychologically messed up? I have no idea. Actually, I think I do… I’m trying to help him and be friends with him right? But how am I trying to help him? He’s not the dark and mysterious type like Chase. Then what am I doing? Actually, he did say he felt better with me around… maybe, he needs me? I don’t know why though. He’s good-looking (I have to admit, even though I’m a guy) and rich? Okay, maybe he’s not famous, but he’s got everything? Why does he need me?
Maybe he needs a lover…
Nathaniel Rhomas
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Insanity
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Post subject: Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 1:31 pm |
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Joined: Sun Sep 23, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 1336 Location: Hibernia
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(( Okay, just figured I'd mention the change since my last post. I haven't read much, since I usually stay away from RP posts, but I must say it's alot easier to read now! Job well done. *Hands Nath a cookie* ))
_________________ Local Lurker and Knower of the Unknown and Unknowable. Also a bit full of itself, and an occasional prick.
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:18 am |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Insanity wrote: (( Okay, just figured I'd mention the change since my last post. I haven't read much, since I usually stay away from RP posts, but I must say it's alot easier to read now! Job well done. *Hands Nath a cookie* ))
((Thankies! *Takes Cookie and eats it* See, I'm good, I stick too good advice! ))
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:23 am |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Tree-Hugger Diaries
5th Of January
I was just thinking, I know this is a very laughable question, but, am I special? I don’t mean it in an invalid way, I mean, what separates me from everyone else? I mean, I’m just a boring accent-less Irish guy, who has weird brown hair, that grows to my shoulders about 1 hour after you cut it, and dark blue eyes which about half the country has. Why do people talk to me? Why are people my friends? Why does Andrew like me? I mean, I’m nothing special.
As I explained in my last diary entry, Andrew has everything. I do not. Well, I have everything I need. But, Andrew has looks, cash… ah, wait a second. I remember I wrote down he wasn’t famous, that’s what he needs! Well, not fame, friends. Think about it, how many friends does he have? Me, Samantha Hathaway, … anyone else? I think not. Well, that’s how many I know of anyway. He only has two friends. Poor guy. Think about it, he hardly ever gets to see them as well, but when he does, he has the time of his life, and then, the next day, he’s thrust back into darkness. How sad must that be?
Okay, imagine your Andrew, a hot guy who has money, looks, everything. But, as you walk across the entrance hall, people scowl at you. They hate you. They wouldn’t care if you died, if you got killed off, the end of term house award ceremony would be happy, because no one cares. You try to reason with people, but all you get is bad looks, and everyone ignores you. Would you be happy? No, you wouldn’t. Good looks and money are nothing when you don’t have friends.
I’d prefer to have friends and have almost nothing else, rather to be in Andrew’s position. Wait a second. I don’t have anything else. Do I? I look alright, but I’m not one of the hottest guys to be walking the earth. I have enough money, but I’m not overly rich, neither is my family. Although, I do have friends. And almost everyone knows me.
Maybe, since we’re opposites, we attract? Yeah, that’s what they say, opposites attract. I wonder what star sign he is, I’m a Capricorn. I’ll have to look in my Astrology text book to see who I’m compatible with. Wait, isn’t that a chat up line? ‘What star sign are you? I’m a so and so.’ Yeah, it is. Okay, I’m stunned for a moment.
I guess I’m writing in this book to amuse myself, I’ve put a locking charm on the door, because one of the prefects was trying to get me to the Hospital Wing. I really don’t want to go there! I really, really don’t want to. It was easy to distract him.
“Oh my god! The grey lady’s taking her clothes off!”
I know, I have a sick mind, and hey! I am sick! He turned around and I closed the door and used the charm. Easy-Peasy. Although, I must admit, I feel terrible. My stomach churns every five minutes, and I throw up in this bucket next to me. Nasty.
Although, I haven’t thrown up for a while. I got a letter off my Mother talking about a ‘vomiting virus’ that’s going around, and I’ve got the symptoms. However, it only goes on for 48 hours, so I’ll be fine tomorrow (Hopefully).
I’ll have one last go at a poem, and then I’ll go back to sleep.
I know I won’t stop denying,
I know that there’s no trying,
I won’t show mercy on you now!
I know that I won’t stop believing,
I know that there’s no retrieving,
It’s over now!
What have you done?
I, have been waiting for someone like you,
But now you are slipping away,
Why? Why does fate make us suffer?
There’s a curse between us,
Between me and you!
Would you mind if I hurt you?
Would you mind if I tried to because you,
Have turned in, to my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I feel,
It’s over now,
What have you done?
What have you done now?
Nah, I’m no good at poems. Although, I’ll keep trying, and one day, I might get better! (I hope)
G’night Diary! Well, it’s not really, night yet… in fact it’s the morning so, G’morning diary.
Nathaniel Rhomas
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 12:38 pm |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Tree-Hugger Diaries
5th Of January (again)
Hooray, I think I’m better now. Although, I still can’t be bothered to get up, I’m just too tired now. I hope everyone is okay now. I really do. As the Yule Ball approaches, I feel like screaming and incinerating everything. IT’S STUPID. I mean, I sure EVERYONE in Hogwarts can’t possibly have a date? Seriously, do the Professors expect us to all be swingers or something? Honestly. I’m sure they have more common sense than that.
I think I’ll go and drain my sorrow out in the EH or CE, when it’s happening. I’m sure someone said that you have to have a date to go in. I don’t even think Andrew will show up either. So yeah, I’m screwed. Unless… nope. Every friend that I have that’s a girl is going out with someone and would never change their minds.
So yeah, I’m pretty upset. I’m never going to find anyone who’s right for me. Never Ever. I’m trying not to care though. I mean, why should I?
Love is a dream I’ll never catch…
Nathaniel Rhomas
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 6:30 am |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Tree-Hugger Diaries
6th Of January
I think Andrew’s taking me to the ball. Or, he might go alone, but meet up with me.
He took me to the Quidditch Locker Rooms today. And he… let’s just say, I like him. I mean, really, really like him. And, I don’t know how to write this… but, we’re together now, I think. I feel weird; it’s like breaking some sort of Taboo or something… Am I? I’m sure I’m not…
I saw Chase today, the ‘legendary’ Priggo Feilen was there duelling against Connor. I don’t know what makes Priggo such a legend, because all I saw of him was a short guy with a lot of spells. Maybe he blackmails people to worship him? I dunno.
Although, everyone I literally mean EVERYONE was watching. Although Priggo was defeated, he didn’t give up, and Connor was all, “I don’t really have the time.” Although, I got scared. Priggo tried to Duro Sam. Somehow, I know he has a lot of power, and could have statued her for quite a while.
What made me a bit wary of Priggo was the fact he was using spells that affect a wide area. AOE spells, I heard someone say. No wonder Chase told me to keep back. I wanted to talk with Chase, but he was too caught up in the fight. I say fight, not duel, because it was rowdy, and people were screaming out for Priggo, and Connor. I didn’t like it. It scared me; someone could have easily got hurt. I wonder why the professors didn’t stop them, or even notice. Strange.
I helped Sam out with her Yule Ball outfit troubles. It was really fun, I told her about Andrew as well, she really understood. She looked really good in her dress, I would be thrilled if she was my date, and we’d look perfect in our outfits. A perfect match. But, she isn’t my date, and I’m not in love with her. She had to get me to make a suit for Connor, as he obviously didn’t have one. Well so I thought.
So, Sam and I are almost finished making the suit, when that idiot Gregory Smith comes in. I don’t know why she’s friends with him.
He was all like, ‘Know any fit girls who are dateless?’ And then Connor came in, with the invisible spell on, and Gregory was lying again, pretending that Connor wasn’t there.
And then, in the end, it turned out Connor had an outfit, and he ruined my work on the mannequin. I got annoyed at that. Then I had to bribe Connor to tell me what he was wearing to the Yule Ball. It turned out it was okay for Sam, and then that was that.
I feel so angry and confused at the moment; I’m still thinking through what happened. I don’t know what to say to Andrew, I feel like Connor is one of those people who pushes you too far, is Chase really okay?
I can smell incense, some nice spice fragrance that I bought from some Gypsies passing through Hogsmeade. It smells really nice, and luckily it doesn’t have any bad charms or anything on it. I bought an incense holder, which props it up. It’s here on the windowsill. It’s soothing me, and I feel better just smelling it.
I don’t know what to think now… today has been such a mess. I hope tomorrow is way better. And, once more, I’ll try and do a poem about someone:
Lost, is where he feels at ease, it’s written in a code, he can’t read, it haunts him,
And how, how can there be hope when he lives it out in fear, on the edge, he’s waiting,
It drove, drove him to despair, not knowing which way to turn,
A mental barrier, people comfort him, through the wasteland deep within his mind,
Can he break it out, while a trap unfolds?
He prays, falls down on his knees, he writes to them full of hope, believes in them and they will help him,
He will fight it out, til his strength gives out,
Should he flow like a goldfish in a bowl, he doesn’t see it out, his solitary world.
Okay, these are kind of, poetic (I think) views of people and their future… not exactly poems… oh well.
Nathaniel Rhomas
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Rakashak
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Post subject: Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 12:31 pm |
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Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2007 12:00 am Posts: 650
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Tree-Hugger Diaries
7th Of January
I don't feel right.
I missed the Yule Ball, Andrew couldn't come.
I went to Egypt and stormed through there, through every tomb, fighting everything that tried to defy me. I guess I got an emotional swing. I have no idea why. I cried as well.
I went to the place Andrew took me. I cried my eyes out. I really don't know why.
Also, I went to Filch's office, I decided to spend the night in Classroom Eleven, again. I had noooo idea the Filch was into gardening. Well, okay, I don't know what he was doing in there. Something about flowers? Well, I don't know. And he's all, 'What you doing in here at night time?' So I tried to leg it, but, I almost trampled his cat, and I was apolgizing to it. So yeah, I gonna try and get my paper thing out of his big bookcase sometime. It smelt of urine in there. It was gross.
Also, I found a copy of kwikspell on the floor. Weird, that's for squibs, did a student put that in there to make a joke? Also I found some old-looking handcuffs in the draw... I have no idea what those were for, mind you, I heard they used to torture kids who badly behaved... scary.
I was also thinking about Andrew, and, I'm comparing him to a drug. He's addictive, to be with. And, I like that.
Well, I messing myself up again aren't I? And yeah, I've concluded that most students in hogwarts are messed up. In fact, we're all messed up in our own indivual way, which is nice, because we all ask each other for support. Although, I wish everyone did help and ask each other for help and support, because some people think they can make it on their own okay, but that's not how it goes. I wish everyone was brought together like a family, because I guess that's how it should be, even the nasty people. So yeah, I suppose that's why I'm trying to help everyone, even if they think I'm annoying and weird and stupid and retar- okay, I'm not that bad. I just wish to help everyone, so they can be free from their ties, and bonds, and contracts, and promises that were never fulfilled.
So yeah, I going to try and really help people. So far, I haven't really helped bring out the best in anyone, but I'm trying really hard. I guess here at Hogwarts, we are all one big family. Well, kinda.
Nathaniel Rhomas
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